21Six.net

Due to the nature of my health, humor, and other words that start with an “h” that may or may not be relevant to this sentence, I’m going to start a new concept on my machine here. I’m going to be reviewing restrooms.

Not just any restrooms, though. Some people don’t like when you walk into their apartment and start critiquing just where that smell is coming from, or even if you walk into their apartment. No, it’s going to be public restrooms. Restaurants, grocery stores, regular stores, wherever I happen to be when the urge to poop overwhelms my sense of decency and I run screaming into a cavern of foul-smelling stuff that could probably peel paint and/or cause severe respiratory disorders.

Why do this? Really? Because I’m tired of going to bathrooms that look like a closet with a toilet stuck in them. I’m not saying these things need to be luxury-order toilets put in a room that plays Hallelujah every time the toilet flushes, but a little bit of effort could be put into them.

I’ll be judging this bathrooms/restrooms/poop-caverns on several aspects on a scale from 1 to 10, using the standard of 1 being the “worst” and 10 being the “best”, though all start at 5 simply for my convenience.

Odor
Should be easy to explain. The odor the room whenever I entered. I’ll add points if they have taken the time to actually place an air deodorizer or air freshener in the room.

Cleanliness
Again, easy to explain. Are there seats clogged with unflushed stuff, are there paper towels everywhere? Etc.

Appearance
This is, essentially, if the stalls/other things are marred from teenagers who feel the need to write phone numbers and other things.

Functionality
Does everything work?

Comfort of Toilet Paper
Very important. Anyone who doesn’t think so is retarded.

Number of Stalls/Urinals
Should be easy enough to understand. This, also, will not be on the scale.

Obviously, this will all only pertain to the Male Bathroom (unless I decide to become a woman in the near future).

Let’s start things off!

The first bathroom on our list is that of a Target store. This one, particularly, is at 4000 1st Avenue, Evansville, Indiana.

Odor – 7.
This bathroom didn’t smell unbearable. They, like Wal-Mart have implemented a green-apple-candy scent that, while not exactly the most pleasant odor, manages to mask the smell enough that one could walk in and not be overrun by the smell of feces or whatever.
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Cleanliness – 4.
When I first entered, there were paper towel remnants on the floor, and the first stall was clogged with something that I’m really not wanting to even think about anymore. I don’t normally see a clogged bowl, so I went easy on them.
—
Appearance – 8.
Typically speaking, Target has some of the cleanest bathrooms I’ve run into. The floors, while sometimes having patches where it’s obvious someone wasn’t taught NOT to pee on the floor, maintain something that isn’t a sticky, disgusting mess to step on. The stalls are a nice, shiny metal that looks rather inviting. The sinks are always nice.

And the door opens outward. I really like that.
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Functionality – 9.
Aside from a plug. I have never gone into that store and experienced anything to be out of order. And I go there pretty frequently.
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Comfort of Toilet Paper – 2.
It’s the mass-stuff. Expect this a lot.

If I wanted to wipe my ass with something that rough, I’d use the paper from my notebook.
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Number of Stalls/Urinals
This store has three stalls with two or three urinals.
—

Overall, this store maintains a very serviceable bathroom. Nothing is too fancy, or unneeded. It features paper-towel drying, as opposed to one of those massive blow-dryers that I don’t really think work that well. It’s also a well-lit bathroom, which is good if you’re the kind of person who worries about things like stool color because of blood and other things like that.

Each sink also has it’s own separate mirror, and soap dispenser. It uses the foamy soap, as opposed to liquid soap. There are, I believe, five sinks. I only noticed three.

Also, as I said, the door opens out, with a push. So you don’t have to feel like you just wasted washing your hands.

That’s all for now! Expect these all to get better and more elaborate with time.